March 21st, 2012

word

selcouth [sel-kooth] adj. strange; uncommon

birthday

Julio Gallo (1910), Russ Meyer (1922), Eddie Money (1949), Gary Oldman (1958), Matthew Broderick (1962), Rosie O’Donnell (1962)

standpoint

Okay, so I bought this new computer, my first Mac, an iBook G4. And I mostly love it. But it’s quirky. It does things I don’t want it to.

Like, for instance, I’ve been having a problem linking on here and, as you know because you read my blog as much as you can, I’m all about links. So, when I started this post I was linking like a maniac, throwing them down at will, raining links at will.

But then, all of a sudden, my laptop decided it’d had enough with links for the evening. It put a stop to the linking. I can’t figure it out and, believe me, I’m good at figuring shit out.

I’ve got two thoughts I’d like share on this matter.

One, I most likely acted too rash and purchased an out-of-date computer that has problems dealing with all of the technological advances that occur daily out here on the internet. My brother Jeremy, a computer whiz if there ever was one, warned me this might happen but I’d all ready completed the transaction and the laptop was en route when I told him about it. The smart move would’ve been to consult him beforehand but, while I’m a pretty smart guy, my intelligence sometimes seems to want nothing to do with decision making.

Two, now that I’ve got this computer, I’m sticking with it. I’m convinced I can get to the bottom of these minor problems. I’m certainly not buying a new laptop until I’ve exhausted all the options. After I’ve done everything in my power to get past these inconveniences, I’m fairly certain I’ll be going to Jeremy to get his advice on what kind Mac I actually should buy.

quotation

Advice to children crossing the street: damn the lights. Watch the cars. The lights ain’t never killed nobody. ↔ Moms Mabley

tune

I thought, what with it being Matthew Broderick’s birthday and all, that I would share the song made famous by Broderick’s most famous movie. Here’s “Oh Yeah” by Yello.

gallimaufry

→ Couldn’t get this section done properly because of the problem I mentioned in standpoint. Let’s face it, I’m not as effective when stripped of the links.

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03.21.11 – a monday

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word

insipid [in-sip-id] adj. 1. without distinctive, interesting or stimulating qualities; vapid: an insipid personality 2. without sufficient taste to be pleasing, as food or drink; bland: a rather insipid soup

birthday

Johann Sebastian Bach (1685), Pierre Renoir (1885), Julio Gallo (1910), Russ Meyer (1922), Solomon Burke (1940), Timothy Dalton (1946), Eddie Money (1949), Gary Oldman (1958), Matthew Broderick (1962), Rosie O’Donnell (1962), Rhys Darby (1974)

standpoint

Starting a new kind of installment this fine Monday. I’m calling it Please Stop Talking! Basically, it’s a laundry list of individuals or groups of individuals whose mouths should be sewn shut.

All of you fantastic Americans who are griping about how we shouldn’t be “wasting our money” helping the people of Japan when there’s “people in this country suffering.” How exactly are you helping out here at home? Oh, you’re not?

→  Everyone who’s got some flippant remark about the tragedy in Japan. Especially those who reference “sushi” or “karaoke” or something equally clever. There are real people over there, dipshits.

Charlie Sheen. For the absolute love of god, Charlie Sheen.

Staunch Republicans. Also, staunch Democrats. In addition, anyone entertaining the idea of becoming a staunch Republican or Democrat. Simmer down. There’s some of us doing some actual thinking. We’ll let you know how it turns out.

Those of you who think you’re somehow more enlightened than the rest of us and are just dying to tell the world all about your take on things. Before you get started, you need to know you’re wrong and you always will be.

Seth Rogen. You’re hapless and go-lucky. You smoke pot and watch porn. You continue to fall ass-backwards into an increasingly charming fate. We get it. We’re over it. Your turn.

quotation

I’m going to simultaneously record an album, direct a movie, and write a novel about how living in suburbia is satisfying and terrific. ↔ Chuck Klosterman

tune

All you hipsters out there can say what you want about Ben Folds. I’ll admit, he’s lost a step in his past few albums or so but the guy is a consummate performer and puts on one hell of a show. Check out this video and, hopefully, you’ll see what I mean.

gallimaufry

Hey, Bret Michaels, thanks for sharing. How are you still valid? Please explain.

→ I’m sure it’s going to make my good friend Joe Taylor’s day when I state the following: I’m actually watching some college hoops this time around, something that, more than once, I’ve publicly proclaimed I would never do. Still not going to link to it on my blog. I’m sure they’ll be fine without my traffic.

→ Love this headline: “Pentagon: Gadhafi forces in disarray after assault.” You think? After “missions that used stealth B-2 bombers, jet fighters, more than 120 Tomahawk cruise missiles and other high-tech weapons,” I’d be psyched if I was Gadhafi to be in “disarray.” It’s how I spent most of my twenties and early thirties. Truthfully, it wasn’t that bad. On a side note, can we get a ruling on how to actually spell the dude’s name? Does it actually start with a “G?” Or is it a “Q?” Wasn’t there a “u” in there at some point? I understand we’re dealing with different alphabets here but, before we move forward with “Operation: Disarray,” let’s nail it down. We’re better than this, people.