February 10th, 2012

word

hiemal [hahyuh-muhl] adj. of or pertaining to winter; wintry

birthday

Jimmy Durante (1893), Robert Wagner (1930), Roberta Flack (1937), Mark Spitz (1950), Glenn Beck (1964), Laura Dern (1967), Elizabeth Banks (1974)

standpoint

First, let me just say that Wednesday’s post was one of my most popular ever and that I appreciated all of the back-and-forth on Facebook. I was tossing around the idea of posting the comment strain here but decided not to as I’m unsure of the legality of re-publishing comments made on there.

Anyway, switching gears, here’s a portion of a conversation between two women I overheard the other night:

Woman #1: Did you read Gone With the Wind yet?

Woman#2: No, but I’m gonna get around to it.

Woman #1: Book group is in two days, the book is like 500 pages, you’re not gonna be able to read it. (eJ – Actually the book is over 1,ooo pages.)

Woman #2: Who cares? I’ll just get shitfaced so no one asks me any questions.

Nearby Guy: Actually, you could just watch the movie version.

Woman #1: They made a movie out of that book?

Nearby Guy: Yeah, it’s pretty famous, probably more famous than the book.

Woman #2: Right. See there? I’ll just watch the movie. Do you think it’s on Netflix?

Woman #1: I’m not sure but they got every movie on Netflix, so probably. But Netflix won’t get it to you on time. Book group is on Thursday.

Woman #2: Well, just tell me the gist, so I can act like I read it.

Woman #1: It all takes place during the Civil War.

Woman #2: Oh, it’s a war story. I hate those.

Woman #1: Nah, nah, it’s not like a shoot-em-up kind of story. It’s mostly a love story between this guy named Brett (Rhett) and this woman named Scarlett. And, if you ask me, Scarlett is the biggest moron that ever lived.

Woman #2: Is it a true story?

Woman #1: I don’t think so but maybe. Why?

Woman #2: You said “the biggest moron that ever lived.” Was she a real person?

Woman #1: No, I mean, she might have actually lived but I don’t know. My point is that she was a total fucking moron.

Woman #2: Okay, why?

Woman #1: I don’t know she just was. I’m not getting into with you because you didn’t read the goddamn book. So I started to get curious about the Civil War and look up some stuff. And I learned more through Google than I did actually reading the book.

Woman #2:  You know you can’t trust all the stuff you find on Google.

Woman #1: You think I don’t know that? But I did learn some shit.

Woman #2: Okay, what did you learn? Anything good?

Woman #1: Oh yeah. Tons. Like did you know that Negroes got the right to vote before women did?

Woman #2: No shit. Wait, are you sure? Negroes? Like how long before?

Woman #1: I don’t really remember but it was a while. A couple of years, I think. I couldn’t believe it, either. I would’ve bet anything women were allowed to vote before Negroes.

Woman #2: You can’t be right about that. Women weren’t first? It was Negroes?

At that point, I had to just walk away.

People are pretty outstanding.

quotation

A world where medical advances allow us to live forever is a terrifying thought. Imagine the crowd. ↔ Salman Rushdie

tune

If you’re cool like me, you’ll be at The Electric Factory in Philadelphia on Saturday, March 24th (hit that link right there to go and get tickets) to see Dr. Dog. I’m betting they’re going to play “That Old Black Hole” somewhere toward the end of their set because, wow, what a great song.

gallimaufry

→ Speaking of same-sex marriage, here’s Governor Christine Gregoire of Washington State doing the right thing.

Michael Vick‘s been attempting to show the world he’s a rehabilitated citizen, but it seems no one but Philadelphia Eagles fans are buying it. The guy just made the top of Forbes‘ list of America’s Most Disliked Athletes.

This isn’t true but it could be.

November 1, 2011

word

rapine [rap-in, -ahyn] n. the violent seizure and carrying off of another’s property; plunder

birthday

Stephen Crane (1871), Larry Flynt (1942), Lyle Lovett (1957), Charlie Kaufman (1958), Anthony Kiedis (1962), Toni Collette (1971), Jenny McCarthy (1972)

standpoint

I’ve been meaning to update the About page of the blog for a while now. And the other night I did. So click here if you want to know more about me. If you don’t, keep moving down for the rest of today’s post, jerk.

quotation

Sarcasm and compassion are two of the qualities that make life on earth tolerable. ↔ Nick Hornby

tune

I’m not a huge fan of people asking me questions like, “What’s your all-time top 5 movies/albums/books/whatevers?” Granted, I’ve got those lists in my head but they may not be the same from one day to the next so I dislike providing them. I always think of additions or subtractions and want to make amendments but the moment has passed. It’s out there and I can’t get it back.  But there are a few constants on those lists. For instance, my Top 5 Favorite Songs list will always include “Hyperspace” by Nada Surf.

gallimaufry

→ I’m annoyed with myself right now. Sometimes I come across a news item that makes me thankful for being served such a softball and I can’t wait to write something witty about it and it just doesn’t come. Anyway, Michael Vick now owns a parrot. Sigh. I’m better than this.

→ Last week I wrote about Herman Cain and how the dude is the king of backtracking. Yesterday, Cain spent his time refuting allegations of sexual harassment. At first he had no recollection of any such allegations. Later he said all the talk of allegations kind of jogged his memory but details were still kind of fuzzy. By evening, the fuzziness was apparently lifted and he was able to provide a detailed account of not only the allegations but how those allegations were handled by his attorneys. I’m real curious to see how this pans out in terms of his campaign.

→ It’s not always easily discernible if The Onion is reporting actual stuff or just fucking around. It must be a blast to work there.

07.27.11 – a wednesday

word

handsel [han-suhl] n. 1. a gift or token for good luck or as an expression of good wishes, as at the beginning of the new year or when entering upon a new situation or enterprise 2. a first installment of payment 3. the initial experience of anything; first encounter with or use of something taken as a token of what will follow; foretaste  v. 4. to give a handsel to 5. to inaugurate auspiciously 6. to use, try or experience for the first time

birthday

Samuel Smith (1752), Jerry Van Dyke (1931), Peggy Fleming (1948), Yahoo Serious (1953), Bill Engvall (1957), Juliana Hatfield (1967), Maya Rudolph (1972), Pete Yorn (1974), Jonathan Rhys Meyers (1977)

standpoint

Sorry, no new standpoint today. But tomorrow probably.

quotation

Ten seconds from now you don’t know what you’re gonna say or think. So who’s in charge? ↔ Harry Dean Stanton

tune

I’m sure the hipster community is up in arms, conducting meetings and planning an appropriate course of action against Justin Vernon over “Beth/Rest” the last song on the new Bon Iver album. It may sound like a b-side from Pink Floyd circa 1984 but, shit, I’m digging it.

gallimaufry

→ I saw Matt and Kim perform last night on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon and they’re pretty fucking awesome, if I do say so myself.

→ What a complete turnaround. Michael Vick must have the most gifted PR people in the history of folks being famous.

This friggin’ guy and his tiger suit are about as creepy as creepy can get.