October 31, 2011

word

cognoscenti [kon-yuhshen-tee, kog-nuh-] n. persons who have superior knowledge and understanding of a particular field, especially in the fine arts, literature, and world of fashion

birthday

John Keats (1795), Dan Rather (1931), Michael Landon (1936), David Ogden Stiers (1942), Peter Frampton (1943), Sally Kirkland (1944), Brian Doyle-Murray (1945), John Candy (1950), Peter Jackson (1961), Johnny Marr (1963), Dermot Mulroney (1963), Rob Schneider (1963), Adam Horovitz (1966), Vanilla Ice (1967)

standpoint
Over the weekend, the Philadelphia area got an early snowstorm and the alarmists were out in full force. One local newswoman warned people whose bed was near a window next to a tree to sleep in another room for fear wind might blow icy branches through the glass panes and be “potentially fatal.” She was being completely serious. 

Hurricane Schwartz and anyone else who claim to predict the weather should be taken as seriously as any FoxNews anchor.

Is it going to be sunny? Is it going to rain? Is it going to snow? What’s the weather guy/girl say? We all ask these questions constantly even though most of us understand forecasting the weather is next to impossible. And that’s due to the simple fact that forecasting the weather is actually impossible.

No one knows what’s going to happen. Yes, I’ll admit they’ve got a slightly better idea about tomorrow’s weather but only slightly. But Hurricane and his cronies aren’t offering their opinions; they’re posing as weather authorities.

It’s fucking genius if you think about it. Without the weather, local news programming is diminished to a tally of all the awful shit that happened during the course of the day, and the rehashing of sporting events that most everyone watched all ready. Without the weather, local news programming has no hold over us. Without that control, hardly anyone would watch. And so, it drums up scary situations in which Mother Nature will make mincemeat out of those of us who neglected to buy a few weeks’ worth of milk and bread hours before every time snowflakes fall from the sky.

For reasons I can’t explain, we still listen to it. And, sadly, we probably always will.

quotation

There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls. ↔ George Carlin

tune

Sometimes I add a song to my iPod and then completely forget about it. A few months later I’ll be driving along listening on shuffle and the song will make a reappearance. And I realize that, for whatever reason, I wasn’t ready to appreciate the song until that moment in time. Such was the way with “Changing” by The Airborne Toxic Event.

gallimaufry

→ Hopefully, this dude will stop talking shit for a while. The Philadelphia Eagles completely embarrassed Rob Ryan and the Dallas Cowboys last night. Guess Andy Reid gets to keep his job for a little longer.

→ This is crazy. 7 BILLION PEOPLE. It’s kinda perplexing.

→ In case you’re wondering what the next frivolous thing we’re all supposed to be worrying about might be, look no further: Sonic Drugs.

Advertisements

05.12.11 – a thursday

word

hubris [hyoo-bris, hoo-] n. excessive pride or self-confidence; arrogance

birthday

Florence Nightingale (1820), Katharine Hepburn (1907), Yogi Berra (1925), Burt Bacharach (1928), Tom Snyder (1936), George Carlin (1938), Steve Winwood (1948), Gabriel Byrne (1950), Billy Squier (1950), Ving Rhames (1959), Emilio Estevez (1962), Tony Hawk (1968), Jason Biggs (1978)

standpoint

I’ve been promising this for the last year or two but it’s finally going to happen. euneJeune – true story will be resurrected from the dead. The existing 13 stories will be revamped in ways that might make them marginally less accurate but exponentially more entertaining. And, for all of you who have sent me emails asking for new stories, (some emails were more demanding than others, I’m talking to you, Bill McLeer), you’ll finally get your wish.

quotation

People who talk about their dreams are actually trying to tell you things about themselves they’d never admit in normal conversation. ↔ Chuck Klosterman

tune

The New Pornographers are one of the best bands I’ve ever seen live. And “Sing Me Spanish Techno” was one of the best songs they performed that night.

gallimaufry

We all knew that, if we were just patient enough and played our cards right, this story would be told. Citizens of Earth, it’s a glorious and fulfilling day!

→ All of you geniuses out there pontificating as to why these natural disasters keep happening around the world and more specifically here in our country, I am formally requesting you take the energy you’re expending and channel it to spread the word about this.

Words With Friends. Usurping Angry Birds as society’s greatest time waster? Maybe. Challenge me to a game (eunejeune) and we’ll discuss it in the chat room as we play.

05.12.09 – Tuesday

Word: augur [aw-ger] n. 1. one of a group of ancient Roman officials charged with observing and interpreting omens for guidance in public affairs 2. soothsayer; prophet ∞ v. tr. 3. to divine or predict, as from omens; prognosticate 4. to serve as an omen or promise of; foreshadow; betoken: Mounting sales augur a profitable year ∞ v. intr 5. to conjecture from signs or omens; predict 6. to be a sign; bode: The movement of troops augurs ill for the peace of the area

Birthday: Florence Nightingale (1820), Henry Cabot Lodge (1850), Katharine Hepburn (1903), Archibald Cox (1912), Mary Kay Ash (1915), Julius Rosenberg (1918), Yogi Berra (1925), Burt Bacharach (1928), Tom Snyder (1936), George Carlin (1937), Ron Zeigler (1939), Steve Winwood (1948), Gabriel Byrne (1950), Billy Squier (1950), Ving Rhames (1959), Bruce McCullouch (1961), Emilio Estevez (1962), Vanessa A. Williams (1963), Stephen Baldwin (1966), Tony Hawk (1968), Kim Fields (1969), Samantha Mathis (1970), Jason Biggs (1978)

Standpoint: Depending on who’s talking, internet porn is either (a) an addiction as strong as alcoholism and gambling, (b) a productive way for couples to keep things fresh or (c) the downfall of society as we know it. As I see it, it’s just like everything else in that it depends on what you do with. If you’re one of those people who can’t leave the house to do basic things like go to work or buy groceries because you’re too busy sitting at your desk watching people have sex, it probably be best for you to unplug your computer and drop it off the roof. If you’re someone who enjoys it on a casual basis without breaking any laws or hurting anyone else, go ahead and have some fun. If you think that internet porn is going to turn your husband and children into sex-worshipping zombies, you should probably try to get out of the house more.  

The opinions are as numerous as they are debatable. But one thing you can’t really argue with is internet porn is easily accessible. When I started my first blog, I relied heavily on pictures to accent every post. So I used Google Image Search a lot. Probably far more than was originally intended. And I always found that, no matter what word or phrase I typed in, I would inevitably come across some sort of lewd sexual activity.

So, I thought it might be interesting to see if that is actually true.  Have we, as a society, found a way to make just about anything erotic? Could I put any word into Google Image Search and find naked people involved in sexual acts? I decided to try it.

For the purposes of this experiment, I defined porn as anything that couldn’t be shown on network television. It might not be the accepted gauge but it’s how I did it. Also, in the interest of keeping this blog respectable, I’m not going to go into detail about the particulars of any of the images. You’ll just have to take my word for it. Or try it yourself. Here’s a list of  random words that I used – starting with items that were in front of me at the time and continuing with whatever popped into my head – and how many images I had to go through to find some inappropriate content:

  • “camera” – 95th image
  • “bottle” – 5th image
  • “key” – 24th image
  • “phone” – 37th image
  • “book” – Search Expired (Google only allows the first 1000 images to be viewed)
  • “sidewalk” – 188th image
  • “brick” – 262th image
  • “desk” – 467th image
  • “chair” – 223rd image
  • “office” – 16th image
  • “girlfriend” – 11th image
  • “boyfriend” – 42nd image
  • “wife” – 2nd image
  • “husband” – 115th image
  • “pregnant” – 11th image
  • “female” – 4th image
  • “male” – 4th image
  • “woman” – 9th image
  • “man” – 26th image
  • “bear” – 40th image
  • “arm” – 200th image
  • “leg” – 16th image
  • “foot” – 5th image
  • “hand” – 10th image
  • “breakfast” – 924th image
  • “brunch” – 461st image
  • “lunch” – Search Expired
  • “dinner” – Search Expired
  • “snack” –  Search Expired 
  • “love” – 64th image
  • “romance” – 229th image
  • “flirting” – 59th image
  • “big” – 1st image
  • “crazy” – 6th image
  • “fun” – 94th image
  • “great” – 6th image
  • “boredom” – 62nd image

So what did all the image searching tell me about internet pornography?

I’ll let you know tomorrow in Part 2. For now, have a look over the results and tell me what conclusions you come to.

Quotation: Freedom lies in being bold.Robert Frost

Tune: They’re called People Under The Stairs. The song is “Plunken ‘Em.” Listen to it. Good, right?

Gallimaufry: There’s some rumblings about A.J. Jacob’s The Year of Living Biblically being made into a feature film. I wonder if it will stir up any controversy? ∞ Am I alone in feeling that if Carrie Prejean were to smother herself with her own breast implants, wait, I don’t even care enough to finish that sentence. ∞ If you’re not a hockey fan, tomorrow night’s Game 7 between the Capitals and the Penguins might just make you one. It promises to be one of the best Game 7’s in recent history. Check it out.

Incoming: Tomorrow – Part 2 of my Image Search experiment. Thursday – Your latest entries for Annoying Sayings & Misused Words. Friday3 Things To Do In Philly When You’re Dead.

04.28.09 – Tuesday

Word: postmodern [pohst-mod-ern] adj. 1. noting or pertaining to architecture of the late 20th century, appearing in the 1960s, that consciously uses complex forms, fantasy and allusions to historic styles, in contrast to the austere forms and emphasis on utility of standard modern architecture 2. extremely modern; cutting edge: postmodern kids who grew up on MTV

Birthday: James Monroe (1758), Oskar Schindler (1908), Ferruccio Lamborghini (1916), Harper Lee (1926), Saddam Hussein (1937), Ann-Margret (1941), Bruno Kirby (1949), Jay Leno (1950), John Daly (1966), Too Short (1966), Kari Wührer (1967), Bridget Moynahan (1971), Elisabeth Röhm (1973), Penélope Cruz (1974), Jessica Alba (1981)

Occurence: 1967Expo 67 opens in Montreal, Canada.

Standpoint: Originality. It’s one of the few qualities someone can possess and gain instant credibility. But one can’t attain originality. Striving for it is pointless since the process one would go through to achieve originality, would automatically make that person unoriginal. It’s confusing. But some have pulled it off. Here’s my 7 Original Individuals:

  • George Carlin – Invented (and perfected) the art of stand-up comedy as we know it today.
  • Tiger Woods – First golfer to be so good, he’s admired outside the realm of his sport.
  • Harvey Milk – Did more for Gay Rights in a short 8-year political career than most could hope to do in a lifetime.
  • Josephine Baker – Singer, dancer, first African American woman to star in a motion picture, Civil Rights activist, French Resistance supporter and recipient of the Croix de Guerre.
  • Chuck Klosterman – Writes the way people talk so effectively that sometimes I forget I’m reading.
  • Andy Kaufman – Should be remembered as more a performance artist than a comedian.
  • Wayne Gretzky – Did more for professional ice hockey than any other one person has done for a sport.

I’m sure you have someone in my mind that I didn’t include on his list. Tell who you think should have been there.

Quotation: A bargain is something you can’t use at a price you can’t resist.Franklin P. Jones

Tune: Another band I know very little about but love what I’ve heard so far. The Record Low. Listen to “The Bottom.”

Gallimaufry: Bea Arthur died over the weekend at the age of 86. Read what the remaining two “Golden Girls” had to say about her passing…Outside of Philadelphia, it’s called the TD Bank Philadelphia International Cycling Championship. Here we just call it “The Bike Race.” And it’s endangered of being cancelled this year. Here’s what you can do to help…Why is a president judged after his first 100 days? Find out why.

Incoming: No post tomorrow. Got some organizing to do due to the move.