08.03.11 – a wednesday

word

gazump [guhzuhmp] v. 1. to cheat (a house buyer) by raising the price, at the time a contract is to be signed, over the amount originally agreed upon  n. 2. an act of gazumping

birthday

Tony Bennett (1926), Martin Sheen (1940), Martha Stewart (1941), John C. McGinley (1959), James Hetfield (1963), Tom Brady (1977), Evangeline Lilly (1979)

standpoint

I’ve been at this a while, the whole blogging thing I mean. Over the years, several friends have started their own blogs and have sought my advice.

One of the primary things I’ve told each and every one of them is this: Don’t blog angry. When people are angry, they feel like venting and writing is one of the best ways to vent. But writing angry material will most always turn readers away.

And, unfortunately, due to current circumstances, I’ve been angry, or some variation of it, lately.

So instead of embarrassing myself and writing things I’m going to regret later, I’ve been abstaining.

And that’s that.

quotation

We will all be flat on our backs at one time or another. That’s when you figure out what you’ve got inside. ↔ Vince Young

tune

My good friend Bill texted me last week and reminded me of “Ramona” by Beck from Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World which, if you’ve been reading this blog’s sporadic entries, you know know has become one of my all-time favorite movies. So, instead of responding to his text (sorry, Bill), I looked up the song on YouTube and, anyway, here’s a great video.

gallimaufry

→ Man, if it wasn’t for the Bible how would me make rational sense of all this crap going on lately?

CBS is set to kill and have a funeral for Charlie Sheen this fall. And we’ll be able to watch it on television.

→ I wanna hang with The Yes Men. Not for a super long time but just enough to see how insane they are.

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04.15.11 – a friday

word

mythomania [mith-uhmey-nee-uh] n. lying or exaggerating to an abnormal degree

birthday

Leonardo da Vinci (1452), Kenneth Lay (1942), Emma Thompson (1959), Seth Rogen (1982), Emma Watson (1990)

standpoint

Here’s a few things that are on bugging the crap out of me right now.

→ The Philadelphia Flyers lost to the Buffalo Sabres last night in the first game of their best-of-seven series. I’m unhappy about that but still hopeful the Flyers will pull this one out and advance to the next round. For to happen, two things will be needed: First, Chris Pronger needs to get back in the lineup. Second, Claude Giroux needs to stop attempting to complete the perfect pass and shoot, shoot, shoot and shoot some more.

Charlie Sheen, you’ve gone from wildly entertaining to mildly amusing to sadly uninteresting in a few short weeks. Take a vacation. Come back and see us in a month or so, maybe a year. We’ll call you when we’re ready to talk.

→ One of my favorite sitcoms ever is NewsRadio. It was way ahead of its time and probably would’ve lasted years longer were it not for the tragic death of Phil Hartman. ReelzChannel is now playing reruns several times a day. It’s the little things, people.

That’s all I have for today. Thanks for reading.

quotation

The great majority of men are bundles of beginnings. ↔ Ralph Waldo Emerson

tune

A few weekends ago, I was browsing around Main Street Music in Manayunk and the lady behind the counter, who couldn’t have been more helpful, recommended I check out Panoptic Mirror Maze, a new release by Brown Recluse. I was ready to buy it but then she discovered she’d sold all the copies in the store. But I came home and checked the Philadelphia band out online and I definitely like what I hear. Here’s “Notorious.” (Brown Recluse will be playing at Main Street Music this Saturday for Record Store Day 2011.)

gallimaufry

Sometimes the comments morons make on an online news story are actually more interesting than the story itself.

Reading this article filled me with the desire to book a flight to absolutely nowhere. Maybe too much information.

Barry Bonds, you completely suck. Seriously. 

03.21.11 – a monday

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word

insipid [in-sip-id] adj. 1. without distinctive, interesting or stimulating qualities; vapid: an insipid personality 2. without sufficient taste to be pleasing, as food or drink; bland: a rather insipid soup

birthday

Johann Sebastian Bach (1685), Pierre Renoir (1885), Julio Gallo (1910), Russ Meyer (1922), Solomon Burke (1940), Timothy Dalton (1946), Eddie Money (1949), Gary Oldman (1958), Matthew Broderick (1962), Rosie O’Donnell (1962), Rhys Darby (1974)

standpoint

Starting a new kind of installment this fine Monday. I’m calling it Please Stop Talking! Basically, it’s a laundry list of individuals or groups of individuals whose mouths should be sewn shut.

All of you fantastic Americans who are griping about how we shouldn’t be “wasting our money” helping the people of Japan when there’s “people in this country suffering.” How exactly are you helping out here at home? Oh, you’re not?

→  Everyone who’s got some flippant remark about the tragedy in Japan. Especially those who reference “sushi” or “karaoke” or something equally clever. There are real people over there, dipshits.

Charlie Sheen. For the absolute love of god, Charlie Sheen.

Staunch Republicans. Also, staunch Democrats. In addition, anyone entertaining the idea of becoming a staunch Republican or Democrat. Simmer down. There’s some of us doing some actual thinking. We’ll let you know how it turns out.

Those of you who think you’re somehow more enlightened than the rest of us and are just dying to tell the world all about your take on things. Before you get started, you need to know you’re wrong and you always will be.

Seth Rogen. You’re hapless and go-lucky. You smoke pot and watch porn. You continue to fall ass-backwards into an increasingly charming fate. We get it. We’re over it. Your turn.

quotation

I’m going to simultaneously record an album, direct a movie, and write a novel about how living in suburbia is satisfying and terrific. ↔ Chuck Klosterman

tune

All you hipsters out there can say what you want about Ben Folds. I’ll admit, he’s lost a step in his past few albums or so but the guy is a consummate performer and puts on one hell of a show. Check out this video and, hopefully, you’ll see what I mean.

gallimaufry

Hey, Bret Michaels, thanks for sharing. How are you still valid? Please explain.

→ I’m sure it’s going to make my good friend Joe Taylor’s day when I state the following: I’m actually watching some college hoops this time around, something that, more than once, I’ve publicly proclaimed I would never do. Still not going to link to it on my blog. I’m sure they’ll be fine without my traffic.

→ Love this headline: “Pentagon: Gadhafi forces in disarray after assault.” You think? After “missions that used stealth B-2 bombers, jet fighters, more than 120 Tomahawk cruise missiles and other high-tech weapons,” I’d be psyched if I was Gadhafi to be in “disarray.” It’s how I spent most of my twenties and early thirties. Truthfully, it wasn’t that bad. On a side note, can we get a ruling on how to actually spell the dude’s name? Does it actually start with a “G?” Or is it a “Q?” Wasn’t there a “u” in there at some point? I understand we’re dealing with different alphabets here but, before we move forward with “Operation: Disarray,” let’s nail it down. We’re better than this, people.

03.10.11 – a thursday

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word

fanfaronade [fan-fer-uhneyd] n. bragging; bravado; bluster

birthday

Edward Baker Lincoln (1846), Bix Beiderbecke (1903), James Earl Ray (1928), Chuck Norris (1940), Osama bin Laden (1957), Jim White (1957), Sharon Stone (1958), Jeff Ament (1963), Rick Rubin (1963), Edie Brickell (1966), Jon Hamm (1971), Timbaland (1971), Eva Herzigova (1973), Carrie Underwood (1983)

standpoint

All right, it’s time for another installment of THE WISHING WELL. Let’s get to it.

I WISH more people would look on the bright side of things. (Even though that’s not always my thing, either.) A short while ago, everyone was walking around bitching about the lack of jobs. Now there’s some more jobs and everyone’s bitching about the quality of jobs out there. If we’ve resigned ourselves to whining about every damn thing, let’s just come out and do it.

I WISH I was able to get this blog done every day like I used to but, simply put, life’s more complicated than it used to be and I suspect it always will be, maybe more so. But I hope I’m wrong about that.

I WISH The Strokes getting back together was something I could get excited about but, so far, my heartbeat’s stayed regular on the whole matter.

I WISH Professor Awesome’s Drinkatorium was an actual place. There’s only two or three of you who’ll know what I mean by that.

I WISH someone would just come over to my house once a week to clean and organize my wardrobe. That’s not too much to ask, is it?

quotation

Giving up a lot isn’t really that hard when you realize that you get more than you give up. ↔ John Goodman

tune

I had some old Don DiLego tracks on my old iPod and, it’s true, I dug them. Someone sent me one of his newer songs the other day, “Falling Into Space,” and guess what? I’m digging on this one, too.

gallimaufry

Let’s let this dude have his day all ready. He’s earned it.

This Catholic priest sex offender list is growing to pretty outrageous proportions. Hey, Vatican, think it might be time to look at those celibacy and non-marriage policies for your clergymen? Doesn’t seem to be working out that well.

Charlie Sheen is breaking every Twitter record imaginable. And we’ve got to have set some record for largest enabling collective in the history of the world.

03.04.11 – a friday

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word

agrestic [uhgres-tik] adj. 1. rural; rustic 2. unpolished; awkward: egrestic behavior

birthday

Antonio Vivaldi (1678), Shemp Howard (1895), Bobby Womack (1944), James Ellroy (1948), Catherine O’Hara (1954), Adrian Zmed (1954), Patricia Heaton (1958), Steven Weber (1961), Evan Dando (1967), Chaz Bono (1969), Buck 65 (1972)

standpoint

All right, I’ll bend to popular opinion. Most of your emails the past two days have been asking me to expound on the whole Charlie Sheen nonsense.

I’d love to write something better than this clip that Joe Taylor sent me but I’m afraid I’m just not that talented. Enjoy.

I enjoy the “gnarley gnarlingtons” quote the most.

quotation

I think I have a duty as a recovering guy to help, to make my knowledge of what I went through accessible. ↔ Charlie Sheen (many moons ago)

tune

The latest of my favorite songs to end up on a television ad, “Sweet Talk, Sweet Talk,” by The New Pornographers.

gallimaufry

The most typical face on the planet Earth looks nothing like anyone I know. Guess I need to meet more people.

→ Both Zsa Zsa Gabor and Elizabeth Taylor are in the hospital. And, while I’m sure neither are psyched about it, they can take solace in the fact that they’re not dead. I was positive both of them were.

Abraham Lincoln was a badass. Sure, the dude has imperfections but I think I’m on solid ground when I say that we all do. Let’s stop trying to disparage the guy. I’d take him over most of you every day of the week.

03.02.11 – a wednesday

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NOTE: Since I’ve come back, I’ve been posting sporadically. I’m trying to get back into the swing of things but things keep getting in the way. One night a friend of mine needed my help. Another night the power went out while I was composing the post. In any case I’ve been housesitting for the past two weeks but I’m back home starting today so posts will resume as usual. Hopefully.

word

au courant [oh-koorahΝ] adj. 1. up-to-date 2. fully aware or familiar; cognizant

birthday

Sam Houston (1793), Dr. Seuss (1904), Desi Arnaz (1917), Mikhail Gorbachev (1931), Tom Wolfe (1931), John Irving (1942), Lou Reed (1942), Gates McFadden (1949), Karen Carpenter (1950), Laraine Newman (1952), Jon Bon Jovi (1962), Daniel Craig (1968), Chris Martin (1977)

standpoint

Here’s why I think this planet, as a whole, is completely fucking doomed.

Charlie Sheen.

The dude’s a complete freaking mess. He’s hopelessly hooked on all types of chemicals. He employs a steady stream of hookers to keep him company. He’s bad to his children and worse to his wives. He’s a deplorable human being and he sucks but that’s not the real problem.

Everyone’s interested in what his next move will be. What’s gonna happen to his popular sitcom Two and a Half Men? Is he committing career suicide with his flippant and seemingly delusional remarks on his situation? An entire nation is wondering: What’s to become of Charlie?

We’re sure to find out since the national media is determined to show us it’s a much bigger whore than the ones on Sheen’s payroll. The guy’s been interviewed at least 429 times in the last three days and there’s no end in sight. And before you start rolling your eyes and sighing, lamenting the current state of news reporting in this country, you should know that Sheen opened up a Twitter account just yesterday and, after a few scant hours and four measly tweets, had over 500,000 followers.

Who else is wondering why? Why do we give a shit what the guy is doing? And before you start formulating your reply, stow it. I know why.

It’s easy. Concentrating on Charlie Sheen is just too damn easy. It’s way easier than, for instance, focusing on how, one after another, countries in the Middle East are becoming hotbeds of revolt. Or how our own country is impossibly gridlocked in an irresolvable dispute between its two main political parties while simultaneously maintaining its cherished status of “Most Hated Nation on the Planet.” Or how we’ll most likely end up destroying the Earth under our feet before we get a chance to annihilate each other.

Those issues not only require intelligent thought but force us to evaluate just what what the hell is going on and, man, that just brings the room down so let’s check out how fucked up Charlie Sheen is today. Did you see his tweet this morning? What in the hell did he mean by that? For real, the guy needs to seek some help, right?

Yes. Charlie Sheen needs help. And so do the rest of us.

quotation

Never miss a chance to shut up. ↔ Will Rogers

tune

I know very little about the band Favorite Saints. But, somehow, “First Words” found its way onto my iPod a few years back and is always on the top of my Play Count list. Enjoy.

gallimaufry

Want cool Philadelphia stuff from days gone by? Sure you do. Check out retrophilly.com for all you’ll need in that department. Thanks to my buddy Neal for sharing this on Facebook.

Newt Gingrich for President? How off-the-charts delusional is this guy?

→ Dear Blink-182, just release the new album all ready.

12.29.09 – A Tuesday

WORD

flippant [flipuhnt] adj. 1. frivolously disrespectful, shallow, or lacking in seriousness; characterized by levity: The audience was shocked by his flippant remarks about patriotism 2. Chiefly Dialect. nimble, limber, or pliant 3. Archaic. glib; voluble

BIRTHDAY

Charles Goodyear (1800), Andrew Johnson (1808), Billy Tipton (1914), Mary Tyler Moore (1936), Jon Voight (1938), Rick Danko (1942), Marianne Faithfull (1946), Ted Danson (1947), Patricia Clarkson (1959), Paula Poundstone (1959), Glen Phillips (1970), Jude Law (1972)

STANDPOINT

No new post as far as the Standpoint today. I’m working on my end of the year lists. Stay tuned.

QUOTATION

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don’t know one child with a full time job and children.Bill Hicks

TUNE

Recently, I’ve discovered Ben Lee was once actually quite solid. (That being stated, I will admit I definitely dug on “Catch My Disease.”) Turns out he was capable of some pretty solid songsmithing. Check out “How To Survive a Broken Heart.”

GALLIMAUFRY

Just in case you’re looking for more proof that just about everyone is absolutely shithouse crazy and not what they seem, you might be interested in reading about Charlie Sheen, who I’ve recently witnessed appearing sane on talk shows, and what he did to his wife after she asked for a divorce. I still like his sitcom, though, Two and a Half Men. Funny is funny.

→ I’m sure some people might look at the story of the couple who got stranded by their GPS and curse technology. But, I’d like for all of us to keep in mind that stories about how GPS systems have helped people not get stranded aren’t really considered newsworthy.

→ Ever had a bad day at work? That’s exactly what Philadelphia Eagles safety Macho Harris had two days ago.  Luckily, the Eagles still managed to defeat the Denver Broncos 30-27.